post V-Day poems

These are entries to a poem contest with the most romantic first line and the least romantic second line….very funny !!

Tonight our love will make us one
Please leave quietly when we are done

When I look in your eyes you take my breath away
…no really, yours smells worse than I can say

I love you madly
So why do I want you to go away so badly

You are rich, beautiful and vibrant
And I crashed you car into a hydrant

My darling, my lover, my beautiful wife:
Marrying you screwed up my life.

I see your face when I am dreaming.
That's why I always wake up screaming.

Kind, intelligent, loving and hot;
This describes everything you are not.

Love may be beautiful, love may be bliss,
But I only slept with you 'cause I was pissed.

I thought that I could love no other
…that is until I met your Mother.

Roses are red, violets are blue,
sugar is sweet, and so are you.
But the roses are wilting, the violets are dead,
the sugar bowl's empty and so is your head.

I want to feel your sweet embrace;
But don't take that paper bag off your face.

I love your smile, your face, and your eyes
-- Damn, I'm good at telling lies!

My love, you take my breath away.
What have you stepped in to smell this way?